by Siri-Gian Khalsa

Personal "boundaries" may seem like a terrible thing to embody--perhaps bringing up images of the razor wire topped Berlin wall on a personal level--of people who never, ever let love in or out; not allowing full heart and its expression to flow between themselves and others.

That lack of flow, that separation among people can arise from those withering habits that were originally established between parent and child, or were created in other very treacherous lifetimes. Then they can be re-triggered as pain, remorse, feelings of loss and abandonment. They can become our own personal iron curtain of separation.

I'm constantly amazed at the industry that has built up around telling women how not to be themselves in order to attract a man. We are told that "Men are From Mars, Women are From Venus," so we better follow "The Rules" - and if we're not getting the results we want, well, "He's Just Not That Into You" (soon to be in movie theaters starring none other than Jennifer Aniston).

Here in Los Angeles, the lovelorn turn to Dr. Pat Allen, who has been here forever and a day peddling humorous relationship gender stereotypes to the desperate and fed up.

I've never actually seen Pat Allen in person, but every few years or so, a friend will recommend her. You can tell that someone has bought into Pat Allen Think when they say things like "doing that puts you into your masculine energy" or "you need to get back into your feminine energy."

This is an amazing story. I will not spoil it for you, just read it for yourself:

Holocaust Survivors Detail Their Love Story

Like many, I have chased romance and "looked for love in all the wrong places." It's good to remember that love will find you, often in the most unexpected locations.

As a coach, it was not easy to take a contrary view to The Secret at the height of its popularity. Certainly, I could have ridden the wave of excitement over the "Law of Attraction," marketed myself as a "Law of Attraction Coach," and maybe made more money while the hype was at its peak.

I knew, however, that The Secret was part of an unhealthy American obsession with materialism over substance, of obsessive goal-setting over spiritual peace. I saw that Americans were getting over their heads in debt and getting wrapped up in the idea that they could have it all, if they just thought positively enough.

A dear friend of mine, who was the first person to introduce me to The Secret, became a subprime mortgage broker when the The Secret hit. He made a lot of money selling mortgages to people who probably couldn't afford them. Now our economy is on the verge of collapse due to these types of mortgages.

I'm toying with the idea of going make-up free for a week to unplug myself from needing to look good and see how I feel. I'm not sure if I'm ready to do it yet, but I'm considering it.

The UK recently celebrated "National No Make-Up Day" on March 27, 2008. What's sad about this are the many negative articles and blog reactions against this concept. Threatened women, grasping onto their make-up as a dying man is to a life preserver, described the holiday as "silly" and "ridiculous."

One blogger writes:

I think this is one of the most ridiculous ideas I’ve ever heard. That’s like saying ‘OK everybody, today we’re all going to shave our hair off’ or ‘Come on, people - today we’re going to walk round with our eyes shut’.